Sentiments

Whether we like it or not, our relationships are solidly founded on sentiment. Many times sentiment is dependent on perceptions, and is nurtured by them. We like, love or hate others depending on our sentiments towards them. Sentiments are cultivated through inter-relationships, through direct and indirect contacts, through the grapevine, and through other subtle avenues, or put plainly, through perceptions.

Following our finer and smarter character traits we work hard to cultivate in others pleasant dispositions by way of an investment for the soliciting of favours when the right occasion presents itself.

For example, it would be terribly hard to refuse a favour after having received gifts, which, understandably, may not necessarily be concrete objects.

There is much truth in the Latin saying "I am afraid of the Danaos when they bring forth their gifts," after having received an imposing Trojan horse left outside the gates of Troy, which led to a disastrous ending.

Which goes on to indicate that offering gifts or receiving them is not always a very sound investment proposal. It all depends on the intentions of the giver as well as of those of the receiver.

A variety of factors may be responsible for sentiments to change. The status of what we love here and now may change. Friends may become foes, comrades may become enemies, acquaintances unknowns.

What happens to objects of sentimental value when the status is lost ?

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Expectations.

Expectaions can be sky-high or abyssmal, though generally somewhere between the two extremes of the spectrum is the norm.

It all depends on one's standards, values, timing, location, background, environment and a myriad other constraints. They also depend on which chess piece we identify ouselves with, and on our position on the board after the first few moves have been made.

Some add up yet another qualifying factor to the expectrations formula, namely, what part fate plays in our lives. It is like the cherry on the cake of life, little realising that the mixing of the ingredients and the baking, are entirely in one's own hands.

In other words, it can be safely said that, the realisation of expectations is basically man-made, or to be consistent with the terminology explained elsewhere in my blog, it is humbei-made.

First expectations are nurtured during the early years when enjoying first lessons on mother's lap, though, presumably, this is a far-cry to-day! That's where the first principles are actively and lovingly drilled, following, more often than not, a regime of trial and error, rewards and corrections.

Expectations become more complex with growth, sometimes taking a commendable turn and at other times taking a downward trend. Though older and wiser is not necessarily an absolute, yet, it always remains dependent on one's own choices.

For some strange reason, the elementary basic traits gained in childhood would permeate through all our actions during all our developmental stages later in life.

In real terms, the young expect success in choice of career, the sick expect good health, the wise expect greater wisdom, we expect to love and be loved, the poor expect their daily bread, the wealthy expect to become richer.

Life sometimes tend to be quite complicated !


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Friendships.

Just think of how many friends you have had, and still have. I mean friends not acquaintances. A long list can be drawn up parallel to our stages of development: childhood friends, teenage friends and adult friends. Friends for keeps and friends for convenience.

The list is endless.

Friends may sometimes be likened to a picture and its frame, or to the pedestal and the statue it carries. The frame in the former is chosen to honour the presence and the stature of the picture it engulfs. It embellishes the colours within with awe and radiates an impact on the viewers. Similarly, the statue mounted on a pedestal fills the spectators with reverence and appreciation.

Are friends likened to frames and pedestals or to portraits and statues ?

Friends are likened to both. One must go to the end of the world to unearth a befitting frame for the portrait of one's best friend. It must be gilted, precious, solid mahagony, impressive. In this way the best elements of the portrait come out splendidly. In like manner, to mount one's best friend on a pedestal, it must be marbled, pure, lofty and imposing.

But, alas! How many times does it become necessary to alter both the frame and the supporting base adorning our pictures and statues. If the change is an improvement, all well and good. But if it is an esteem lowering exercise, it is necessarily regrettable.

Perhaps, that is why we often like to say that the dog is man's best friend. It would be a problem to find befitting frames and pedestals for all our dog pets!


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